WBTH1 is 100% FREE for Christmas.

And a huge announcement explaining why I just said 'WBTH1' instead of 'WBTH'

Hello all. Firstly I wanted to thank you all for being here. My time on Substack has been an interesting journey so far. I decided a few months ago I wanted to give everyone something for Christmas, but I wasn’t sure what. The obvious choice was a new story.

But that’s too easy, isn’t it? I post stories every month already.

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The first gift.

Firstly, I have made WHO BUILT THE HUMANS? completely free again, for December 24th and 25th. Amazon only. Timezone PST.

It starts Saturday, December 24, 2022, 12:00 AM PST (That’s 8am in the UK)

It ends Sunday, December 25, 2022, 11:59 PM PST (Again, 8am for us brits)

If you live outside the PST timezone, you’ll need to find how your time zone relates to the US in order to work out when it is available.

There’s no catch. All you need is an Amazon account.

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The second gift.

I have put a lot of time into chiselling away at the WHALE story, and have since realised I would rather name it after Galina, the astronaut who dies at the beginning. I’ve gone back into it and added a lot of comedy elements and worldbuilding. I’ve also added a new tagline for the front of the book, 1970’s style.

“Eons have passed since humankind's sudden extinction. Could one alien treasure hunter find the key to our rebirth?”

I would buy that.

It’s still going to be released in Seven Stories about Time Travel, but I felt it needed its own life outside the collection as well. So why not release it on its own for free?

The full eBook isn’t quite ready yet, but I will email you the first part of the story tomorrow, on Christmas Eve, so look out for it.

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The third gift.

Is a gift for me, and for you. It’s a book you might feel oddly familiar with. In fact, you might feel you’ve seen the cover somewhere before. Are you ready?

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WHO BUILT THE HUMANS? TWO

Yes, there’s another one.

A handful of you already knew. Thanks for not spoiling it. May the crablords spare you.

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There will be a second WHO BUILT THE HUMANS?

This is why Hologram Kebab was cancelled. I realised in development that it was actually a sequel to WBTH1. So that entire collection has been consumed, recycled, transformed and transferred into this book. So it was never really cancelled. It became the codename for WBTH2.

You can expect hologram kebabs, space crabs, sperm exo-battle-suits (yes, really), story machines, more time travel, and a crossover or two with the SevenStoriesSeries. That’s coming in 2023 as well, but we’ll talk about that in a few weeks. Right now let’s talk about WHO BUILT THE HUMANS? TWO.

As you can see, it is already full of weird content.

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So when is WBTH2 coming out?

I’m thinking late 2023. Like the original WBTH, it is going to be crowdfunded, but this time round I am smarter and will be doing it through Crowdfundr rather than Etsy. I will launch the crowdfunding page for WBTH2 in early 2023, once more people know about it.

I am taking this thing seriously. WBTH2 is going to be big.

I’m also planning to get an audiobook of WBTH1 done in 2023, so you have that to look forward to as well.

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I am basically AREA 51, but for books.

When fans asked back in early 2022, I said it wasn’t happening. But all that time I have been thinking about it, working on it, and trying to outdo myself. That last part has been a challenge. Obviously I’m a better writer now, but trying to keep up with and improve upon the choose-your-fate style of the On-Series Universe, or the dark existentialist drama of Lucy’s Universe has been a real puzzle, especially considering Nori Furukawa’s universe grew so large on its own that it became its own trilogy of full-length novels.

But that’s good. I didn’t want to rely on expansions to old stories anyway.

I wanted to do something new again, something weird which breaks even my own conventions.

Yes, some characters you love are back, but it’s mostly going to be new aliens, new stories, new jokes.

I was going to launch the crowd funding on Christmas Day, but I am still working on it and don’t want to rush it. So you’ll see it in the new year.

Please vote on this poll so I can work out what everyone is most interested in. It will help me as I develop the Crowdfundr page.

You’ll notice the audiobook isn’t included, that’s because it will launch separately as a Halfplanet Press project later in the year.

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But that’s not all.

To say thanks to everyone who is following this substack, I plan to incorporate a subscriber-only discount code for the WBTH2 Crowdfundr page when it launches. There will only be a limited amount of times it can be used, so stay tuned and you’ll hear about it first.

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Okay, time to rest.

Let’s let the news sink in.

There is going to be another WHO BUILT THE HUMANS?

ANOTHER ONE.

I AM VERY EXCITED ABOUT THIS.

ALLOCATED REST TIME IS FINISHED.

A collage-style cover perfectly captures the weirdness within.

I don’t think I’ll be on the final cover, but a fan suggested it during development and I thought it was funny.

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You’re going to love the full cover reveal coming in January. It’s ridiculous.

Are you excited?

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The end.

Again, thanks for being here. It’s very nice to know so many people want to keep reading my stories. I’ve got a lot of projects on the way in 2023, and if you stick around, you’ll hear about them first.

See you soon.

Stay weird.

— Phillip

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Right now I have a goal for a webcam for my talk show. Currently 18% of the way there!